I used to get so very upset when someone would question my PTSD diagnosis. I felt like an impostor. I think my feelings were based on the fact that I, myself, spent years in denial so it was very easy for me to also question. I believed the same things that I hear from other people. How can a FEMALE get combat PTSD, how can an AIRMAN get combat PTSD? I thought it was stupid to try and throw that label on me. But years upon years of therapy have shown me that yes, shockingly, it is true! I could go on and believe those of you with no higher than a high school diploma, but I like to think God gave me the smarts to trust those who spend 12 years in college and who spent years researching and studying PTSD.
I recently interviewed for an article that was supposed to be about the recent victory in a lawsuit I participated in. The lawsuit was not about if you think I have PTSD or if you think I should have PTSD. The lawsuit was about those, who like me, were ILLEGALLY discharged for PTSD with a rating less than 50%. If the military didn’t feel I really had PTSD, they shouldn’t have booted me. But they did. They sent me to several doctors, all who agreed that I do, indeed, have it. I didn’t have it, I deployed three times, I now have it. Walks like a duck, talks like a duck.. you know the rest. Would I rather NOT have it? Sure! But that’s not my life. THIS is my life. I would and will take whatever people want to dish if that’s what needs to happen to at least get people to read the articles about this lawsuit and raise awareness. I am proud of my service. I am PROUD to have been a part of the lawsuit. I am proud that those who were included have now been awarded what they served and fought for. I am PROUD and no comments or remarks from complete strangers will take my pride.
The Journey 